Aahh, the life of a military wife. Well, to be more accurate, military girlfriend since we are technically not married. Yet... Two sentances in and I'm off on a sidebar already: Steve says "soon" when he talks about us getting married, but I still don't know what that means. Referring back to one of my first blogs, I'm being patient and waiting for God's timing on that one. He already told me we are getting married, just didn't tell me WHEN... Now, back on topic. In the past 6 months, Steve has had at least 2 or 3 drills where he has had to pack EVERYTHING he has been issued so they can do an inventory (I forget the accronym for that one). The drill before AT kinda made sense that he had to inventory all his stuff, and of course he had to bring all of his stuff to AT as well. But the other 2 inventories, not so much. And he is doing inventory again this weekend. His unit is supposed to deploy next year sometime, but until there are orders issued, that is just a rumor. However, Steve's unit has not been deployed since they came back in 2009, so I guess it is about that time again. I really don't want Steve to deploy again, but that is just part of being in the military. But our relationship didn't survive his one and only deployment. Steve deploying is something I really don't want to talk about or acknowledge the possibility. But ignoring that possibility and sticking my fingers in my ears and screaming "la la la la la la la I can't hear you la la la la la la I'm not listening la la la la la la la la" is not really an option for me. That would just make me ignorant and childish. And I think that if Steve does deploy next year, it would make the initial part of the deployment that much harder. I do have one thing now that I did not in 2008 for Steve's first deployment: faith and trust in God. I was really not living for Him back then. I knew He was there and I believed in God, but He was not a part of my life. Psalm 27:1 "The Lord is my light and salvation, whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life- of whom shall I be afraid?". It's weird, in the days and weeks leading up to Steve's deployment in 2008, I was nervous, pensive, scared, and so many other not so happy emotions. I knew it was coming and there was nothing I could do about it. I always knew it could happen. I have always known this, but managed to ignore it. I can't do that anymore, I guess. Yes, I am nervous that everytime Steve has drill, he's gonna come home with orders to deploy. But now I have confidence that it will all work out and we will be fine. Just praying that these inventory drills are over with soon so I can relax a little. And praying that Steve finishes this next year of his service with no more deployments...
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Monday, August 8, 2011
Beautiful Life
Once again, I have had too much time since my last post and much has happened. One of the newest changes is that my sister and her boyfriend, Matt, moved into my house. On July 13th, Matt called me and said that he and Jennifer were no longer welcome in his mother's house (long, stupid story) and asked if the offer for them to live with me was still open. Of course it was! So that Saturday, me and my mom helped them to move to the house. Really sucked because that had to have been one of the hottest and most humid days this year! It was nasty out! But they are all moved and settled in. So far, it has been really nice having them there :)
What else, what else? Ooohh, I finished my 4th step!!! Yay me! That was really hard to do, too! It took a few conversations with my sponsor, but I finally got it done. I had written a few things down here and there, but I knew I needed like an hour or two alone, by myself, in the quiet, to really do this step in my program. I came home one day a couple weeks ago and the only one at the house was Matt, and he was in his room. I had been planning on mowing the lawn, but I saw my opportunity to do my 4th step. It took me just over and hour, but I got it written down. I laughed, I cried, I gritted my teeth, I prayed, and I did it. And it was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I know there are a few things that I need to add since that day, but I will get there. I have also scheduled my 5th step with my sponsor. Another step that I know may be hard, but I am really looking forward to it now. I just can't wait to stop looking in the rear view mirror and get this crap outta my life!
This summer has gone by really fast! Steve and I went fishing on the 4th of July and got really, really sunburned! His whole back and shoulders and my back, chest, and legs were seriously red for days. Like, glowing in the dark red! One of the most painful sunburns either of us has ever had! And we haven't been fishing since :( I think we need to bust out the fishing poles and go to the lake this weekend!
Serenity starts 1st grade in just a few weeks! I can't believe it! My baby is in 1st grade this year! The older she get, the faster time seems to go by. I wonder if it will go by even faster with my future children? Does time go by exponentially faster with each child? I sure hope not! I want to enjoy these days and make them go by slower, not faster. Serenity can be such a little stinker some days, but I have seen some amazing changes in her recently. Like this past Sunday, for example. Because I am a volunteer at the Crossing, she is in Orange Planet, a class for kids of volunteers to learn leadership skills and how to help and volunteer around the church. So Sunday last week, I was on the schedule for all 3 services on the SIT team. Serenity said she wanted to be with me for the last service and I said I would think about it. Well, I got her from her class before the third service started. I was short a couple people, so I asked Serenity if she wanted to help and she was like YEA!!! So I gave her a job to do and she did so great! She was nervous about greeting people, but she did it anyway and I was so proud of my little girl! She served her Jesus with such excellence! It was so amazing! By the end of the service, I think she was a little tired because this is what she did while we were waiting to do the offering:
How many times do we, as adults, want to just put a bucket over our head and pout? I know I have! I sent this to my team leader and she got a huge kick out of it! I guess I didn't realize when I took the picture how funny Serenity looked... What a cutie :)
There is more to blog about here, but I could go on all day. So much has been going on in my life, but that is for another chapter in the life of Lala.
What else, what else? Ooohh, I finished my 4th step!!! Yay me! That was really hard to do, too! It took a few conversations with my sponsor, but I finally got it done. I had written a few things down here and there, but I knew I needed like an hour or two alone, by myself, in the quiet, to really do this step in my program. I came home one day a couple weeks ago and the only one at the house was Matt, and he was in his room. I had been planning on mowing the lawn, but I saw my opportunity to do my 4th step. It took me just over and hour, but I got it written down. I laughed, I cried, I gritted my teeth, I prayed, and I did it. And it was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I know there are a few things that I need to add since that day, but I will get there. I have also scheduled my 5th step with my sponsor. Another step that I know may be hard, but I am really looking forward to it now. I just can't wait to stop looking in the rear view mirror and get this crap outta my life!
This summer has gone by really fast! Steve and I went fishing on the 4th of July and got really, really sunburned! His whole back and shoulders and my back, chest, and legs were seriously red for days. Like, glowing in the dark red! One of the most painful sunburns either of us has ever had! And we haven't been fishing since :( I think we need to bust out the fishing poles and go to the lake this weekend!
Serenity starts 1st grade in just a few weeks! I can't believe it! My baby is in 1st grade this year! The older she get, the faster time seems to go by. I wonder if it will go by even faster with my future children? Does time go by exponentially faster with each child? I sure hope not! I want to enjoy these days and make them go by slower, not faster. Serenity can be such a little stinker some days, but I have seen some amazing changes in her recently. Like this past Sunday, for example. Because I am a volunteer at the Crossing, she is in Orange Planet, a class for kids of volunteers to learn leadership skills and how to help and volunteer around the church. So Sunday last week, I was on the schedule for all 3 services on the SIT team. Serenity said she wanted to be with me for the last service and I said I would think about it. Well, I got her from her class before the third service started. I was short a couple people, so I asked Serenity if she wanted to help and she was like YEA!!! So I gave her a job to do and she did so great! She was nervous about greeting people, but she did it anyway and I was so proud of my little girl! She served her Jesus with such excellence! It was so amazing! By the end of the service, I think she was a little tired because this is what she did while we were waiting to do the offering:
How many times do we, as adults, want to just put a bucket over our head and pout? I know I have! I sent this to my team leader and she got a huge kick out of it! I guess I didn't realize when I took the picture how funny Serenity looked... What a cutie :)
There is more to blog about here, but I could go on all day. So much has been going on in my life, but that is for another chapter in the life of Lala.
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